You just got schooled Biden-style!

Saturday Night Live does the St. Louis, Vice Presidential debates pitch perfect. Tina Fey, I think I love you, so what am I so afraid of? The creepy accuracy of your Sarah Palin impression. And the fact that you will just use her gibberish verbatim. It's surreal. And I can't think of the guy who's playing Joe Biden (Jason Sudeikis), but I love you too. And Queen Latifah, you're more proof that SNL could stand to hire, like, one other black person, but I love you as well. Good show!

Michelle Watches Debate In Michigan

Sarah Palin Debate Flow-Chart

Source: Huffington Post

Mad Dogs and Barracudas

After a night of sleeping on it and some reflection through reading others' responses to the debate I've decided that since this was virtually an error free showdown in the Gateway City (and by "error free" I mean "nightmarish gaffe-free"), neither veep pick did any real damage to their respective campaigns.

Joe Biden was a Mad Dog with manners. Sarah "Barracuda" Palin was biting, but didn't leave many marks because she had to prove to everyone, from her base to the pundits, that she was ready for primetime.

She may have stemmed the tide on The George Will Revolt, even reversed the trend on a few of the weaker ones. Peggy Noonan was didn't bleat "It's over." Kathleen Parker, who called for Palin to bow out has a column running Friday detailing how she's received death threats for her "betrayal" of the Republican Party.

She gave the Dixie Chicks a shout-out for now knowing what it's like to live in Stalin's America. This column was written pre-debate though, so she might be back on the McCain-Palin bus today.

A lot of articles and columns mention Palin's proclivity to bust out the folksy talk and her audacity to even wink at the camera a few times, perhaps unaware that she was turning into Tina Fey's parody of her during those moments. While this probably endeared her to her die hard fans, it seems it grated almost everyone who reads this blog and the uncommitted voters at CNN who's ratings meters took a nose dive at first sound of a "shucky-durn." Perhaps it was because we'd all seen this show before and wanted something different -- something that perhaps included some facts and substance to go with those talking points.

Or maybe it's because the current occupant of the White House is also known for his hucksterisms which were really a ploy to make up for his incuriousness and intellectual shortcomings. Maybe everyone was just coughing loudly into their hands "ahem ... bullshit!" every time she went into her "say it ain't so, Joe" doing her best George W. Bush-Ronald Reagan-Ross Perot mash-up.

Mabye Cowboys owner Jerry Jones should run for president. Or James Carville. Or Fred "Foghorn Leghorn" Thompson.

Oh wait. I think that last one did give it the ol' college try. Never mind!

But who cares what I think! (Biden won decisively, if just for answering the damn questions!)

What did all the insta polls, reporters, editors, columnists, pundits and political operatives think?

THE INSTA POLLS ARE IN ... FOR MAD DOG BIDEN

It didn't hurt that he didn't declare that he was just going to answer the questions any ol' kinda way, then proceeded to give no specific in the most important election since never.

Reported The Associated Press: A CBS News/Knowledge Networks Poll of uncommitted voters who watched the debate found 46 percent thinking Biden won, with 21 percent siding with Palin. A CNN poll found respondents judging Biden the winner by a 51 percent to 39 percent margin.

AND HERE COME THE MONDAY MORNING QUARTERBACKS!
Consensus: Biden won. She won. McCain lost, to paraphrase Slate's John Dickerson

Tie goes to the hockey mom. Who won last night's vice presidential debate? The answer depends on which ticket you support. If you like Obama-Biden, then Joe Biden won. If you prefer McCain-Palin, Sarah Palin did. That's how you can tell a tie. That's what this was. And since Biden was supposed to destroy Palin, and didn't even come close, this was a good night for the Republican. (Rueben Naverrette Jr., columnist/contributor, CNN)

Palin's answers in this debate vacillated between disappointing and incoherent. On the most pressing issue facing Americans this week -- the economy -- she had surprisingly little to offer. She repeated the McCain tax cut plan and health care plan. (Hillary Rosen, political director The Huffington Post, CNN)

My gut tells me there will be a partisan response to this debate with Democrats arguing Biden won, and Republicans reassured by Palin's performance. However there was nothing to this debate that is likely to change the trajectory of the race. (George Stephanopoulos, ABC News)

The whole debate was about Sarah Palin. She is not a person of thought but of action. Interviews are about thinking, about reflecting, marshaling data and integrating it into an answer. Debates are more active, more propelled—they are thrust and parry. They are for campaigners. She is a campaigner. Her syntax did not hold, but her magnetism did. At one point she literally winked at the nation.

As far as Mrs. Palin was concerned, Gwen Ifill was not there, and Joe Biden was not there. Sarah and the camera were there. This was classic "talk over the heads of the media straight to the people," and it is a long time since I've seen it done so well, though so transparently. There were moments when she seemed to be doing an infomercial pitch for charm in politics. But it was an effective infomercial. (Peggy Noonan, Wall Street Journal)

Palin did not defend, or even attempt to defend, McCain’s plan to begin taxing health-care benefits--a plan that most experts agree would end up costing families thousands of dollars a year. Nor did she defend in any detail McCain’s proposal to cut $400 billion in corporate taxes over the next decade (a plan that Biden brought up repeatedly) ... As aggressive as her performance was, it is unlikely that it moved the overall horserace numbers. But she did show that she not only knows how to field dress a moose, but to stand toe to toe with a senator. (Howard Fineman, Newsweek)

Was she capable of being vice president? Based on her debate performance, the answer was yes. Not that she came close to matching Biden's experience or extensive knowledge of issues, especially foreign policy issues. But she was conversant with every issue, domestic and foreign, that came up in the 90-minute debate and talked with seeming confidence about them. (Fred Barnes, The Weekly Standard)

Maybe she doesn't want to talk more about global warming, or about what vice presidents do, or about who's commanding US troops in Afghanistan. Perhaps she isn't entirely clear on where her running mate is on everything (it's only been, like, five weeks). Maybe (definitely) she really, really wants us to think she and McCain are "mavericks." But Palin returned to the source of her popularity Thursday night at Washington University in St. Louis -- the folksy, aw-shucks, look-who's-running-for-vice-president appeal that reminds us that shortly before she was a drag on the ticket she was a phenom in her own right. (Rick Klein with Hope Ditto, ABC News)

It was, in the end, what viewers might have expected from the man who is chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee -- much as what they got from Gov. Palin was what they were led to expect from her widely heralded speech to the Republican national convention just a few weeks ago. It was a fascinating byplay -- but not necessarily one that changed many minds. (Gerald F. Seib, Wall Street Journal)

A more conventional vice-presidential candidate could have used the platform of the debate on Thursday to go after Mr. Obama and turn this night into a referendum on Mr. Obama. And Ms. Palin certainly tried, attacking Mr. Obama repeatedly for his views on national security, and taxes, prompting equally passionate rebuttals from Mr. Biden. But she had become such an outsized figure since her explosive introduction to the country by Mr. McCain that the story of this debate was always going to be about Ms. Palin, and not Mr. Obama. It seems fair to say that Americans who tuned in to this debate watched to get their impression of Ms. Palin, and not to hear what she had to say about Mr. Obama. (Adam Nagourney , The New York Times)

At times it was effective (Palin's folksy charm), (b)ut more often, with her facial expressions and aw-shucks asides (she even winked at the camera at least twice), it seemed out of place. But Palin didn’t need to hit this one out of the park, she just needed to be steady and mistake-free, and she largely succeeded. If Palin was steady, Biden was strong. There aren't many who doubt the Delaware senator’s knowledge on most issues but there have been nervous Democrats who worry about his tendency to go on for too long and step into gaffes in the process. He sometimes seemed conscious about those problem areas, mentioning twice that his allotted time was close to expiring, almost as if to remind himself to stop talking. (Vaughn Ververs, CBS News)

Palin and Biden were each appealing in their own way -- and in ways that neither McCain nor Obama were in their first debate last Friday. Palin wore a bright smile throughout the exchange and carried herself with confidence ... Biden was direct, not verbose, and his answers came crisply in contrast to Obama's more studied and sometimes pausing style of speaking ... And he, too, flashed his smile to good effect. (Dan Balz, The Washington Post)

Palin broke no new ground, though she toured the landscape of McCain policy positions with surprising fluency. Like the last debate, this one was surprisingly wonky — a lifetime subscription to Congressional Quarterly. Palin could not match Biden when it came to policy detail, but she never obviously floundered. (David Brooks, The New York Times)

For some viewers, her autopilot replies might be a turnoff. But for conservatives and independents who want to like her, she probably performed well enough--and she probably performed well enough to stop the hemorrhaging she had caused the campaign. Which means that perhaps John McCain will return to center stage, as Palin--and her uninformed responses to Katie Couric's questions--becomes less of an issue. (Kevin Drum, Mother Jones)

Everybody wondered how Palin would do. At least as important, or more, was that Joe Biden did a superb job. He deftly stopped Palin from distorting Obama's views. He won the tax cut argument-- Democrats usually don't. He won the health care argument; Palin just gave up. She wouldn't -- couldn't -- answer the questions; she wanted to talk about energy, which she's supposed to know something about, but she even lost on that . Often she didn't know or couldn't say what McCain's policy is. And on foreign policy, she must have been staring out the window when she sat down with Henry Kissinger. She "loves" Israel but can't discuss mideast realities in one inch depth. She can't even articulate basic conditions for the use of nuclear weapons. (Robert Shrum, Real Clear Politics)

Palin's syntax is odd, and she has noticeable verbal tics, saying "here," "there" and "also" too much. Occasionally, she gets lost in a blizzard of her own words. But the quirkiness makes her more vivid, setting her apart from the rest of the political establishment. By the end, as she got even more comfortable, she seemed to become more winsome by the minute - her smile sparkling as she even threw off the occasional wink. She jabbed Biden with a good-natured, "There you go again, Joe." And Biden himself seemed genuinely charmed. (Rich Lowrey, New York Post)

As the debate wound down, it was clear that neither candidate would land a knockout punch — or coin one of those lines that linger in political memory. Palin had disproved the worst fears about her competence. Biden had revealed himself as a disciplined combatant rather than a loose cannon. But their debate had not changed the dynamic of the campaign. (Editorial, The Rocky Mountain News)

Altogether, they clashed in a spirited debate that was far more illuminating than the conversation between their running mates last week. The public benefited, but perhaps no one benefited more than Palin in showing that she could comfortably hold her own with a six-term senator who chairs the Foreign Relations Committee. The hockey mom played a great game. (Editorial, New York Daily News)

We cannot recall when there were lower expectations for a candidate than the ones that preceded Sarah Palin’s appearance in Thursday night’s vice-presidential debate with Joseph Biden. After a series of stumbling interviews that raised serious doubts even among conservatives about her fitness to serve as vice president, Ms. Palin had to do little more than say one or two sensible things and avoid an election-defining gaffe. By that standard, but only by that standard, the governor of Alaska did well. But Ms. Palin never really got beyond her talking points in 90 minutes, mostly repeating clichés and tired attack lines and energetically refusing to answer far too many questions. (Editorial, The New York Times)

Mrs. Palin couldn't match Mr. Biden's fluency on Bosnia or Darfur last night, but not too long ago neither could Barack Obama. The Republican nominee more than held her own on foreign policy in general, and in our view won on points at least on Iraq and Afghanistan. She didn't let Mr. Biden get away with interpreting the comments of a U.S. general in Afghanistan as a rejection of Mr. McCain's strategy. And on Iraq she exposed both Mr. Biden's change of heart on the war, and his change of heart on Mr. Obama's views on the war. At times Mr. Biden even looked a little frustrated -- as if he couldn't quite believe he had to share the stage with someone who hasn't hung out with Dick Lugar or . . . Mike Mansfield back when the Senate was still a civil place. Or someone who says "doggonit." (Editorial, The Wall Street Journal)

(S)he got out alive, though there were white-knuckle moments along the way: questions that were answered with painfully obvious talking points that betrayed scant knowledge of the issue at hand and sometimes little relevance to the question that had been asked. But recent days have given John McCain’s team little reason to suppose that not-that-bad is good enough. The Republican ticket’s sliding polls and narrowing electoral map gave it a different imperative in Palin's showdown against Joe Biden ... Absent new polling, there is little reason to think she cleared that bar in St. Louis. (John F. Harris and Mike Allen, Politco.com)

But regardless of who won or lost, a vice-presidential debate doesn't matter unless it produces a major gaffe. This one didn't. So, people will vote on the person at the top of the ticket, and by that criterion, even if you think Palin won the debate, it's hard to see how she changed the race much. That's not great news for John McCain. Both national and state polls are going in the wrong direction for him. (John Dickerson, Slate.com)

From the moment Palin walked onstage and asked Biden, "Hey, can I call you Joe?" she projected a folksiness that constantly threatened to tip over from "authentic" to "a little overdone," all delivered in the kind of nasal snow-belt honk that won Frances McDormand an Oscar in "Fargo" ... That tipping point probably came around the time she spouted this line, which sounded like something out of "Leave it to Beaver" meets "Hardball": "Say it ain't so, Joe, there you go again pointing backwards again. You [prefaced] your whole comment with the Bush administration. Now, doggone it, let's look ahead." Sometimes her folksy language got a little garbled -- like when she used what is evidently a favorite phrase and said mortgage lenders were "rearing that head of abuse." (Mike Madden, Salon.com)

AND THE POLLS SAY ...

Real Clear Politics has Obama up nationwide by 5.8 percent in their poll averages. But we'll know if the debate moved the goal posts later. By the way, Obama's up by 10 in Michigan and McCain has pulled out his troops.

The VP Debate: A Few Early Observations

She had two strategies:

1) Never answer the question.

2) Say "Maverick" and "Alaska" as much as possible

Other than that, she proved she could have been in the senate because Gov. Sarah Palin could filibuster her ass off. I also appreciated that she couldn't say what she would cut from the McCain-Palin plan because she'd only been at this for five weeks and that she agreed with Vice President Dick Cheney that the office of the vice presidency exists in a no-man's-land between the Senate and the Executive Branch.

Sen. "Mad Dog" Joe Biden, by far, gave the best debate of his life (possibly after taking some Adavan), showing restrait even when he could have scored cheap points of Palin mispronouncing the name of a general and avoiding all questions. Biden actually gave a pretty substantive debate, at least naming what he would cut due to the financial crisis. He went safe with "foreign aid," but it was better than Palin's "I've only been at this for five weeks." He also was able to remember that the constitution is pretty specific about the role of the vice president and that it states that the office is in the Executive Branch ... you know? In case anyone cares.

Or reads.

I actually enjoyed the debate because Biden is probably the best debater out of the whole foursome and was pretty entertaining to watch. I also enjoyed Palin's ability to make almost every question about her and her views on energy. Even when Biden was beating up on McCain (which was his main job during the debate) she still spent a good portion of her time trying to remind people how awesome she is, how she's never changed her mind or regretted anything and that she is soooo totally ready.

For reals. So stop doubting the baracuda and break out the ticker tape parade. She's engraved the name plates and is ready to lead from DAY ONE, people! Even the gays! She totally respects your civil rights too, whoo hoo!

You'll Know Us By the Sound of How We Pronounce Missouri

Stop me if you haven't heard this before -- Missouri is the Show-Me State.

It's our motto of sorts, conveying that Missourians are a "don't talk about it, be about it" people. Of course, if you ask most Missourians I'm not a real Missourian because I'm from the "Sodom and Gomorrah" of the Mississippi River. From your most Catholic American city outside of New Orleans, La. and Boston, Mass. -- St. Louis.

I'm a St. Louisan, which is not one-in-the-same with being "Missourian." For one, a lot of us insist on pronouncing Missouri "Missoureee," proving how questionable we are.

St. Louis and Kansas City have all the money, sports teams, corporations and racial tensions of any mid-to-large sized Midwestern city, but the real Missouri (which is pronounced "Missourah" there), runs the state. Former St. Louis Mayor Vince Schoemehl's dreams of being mayor were destroyed in 1992 when he referred to his Democratic rival, country dweller Mel Carnahan, as the Redneck from Rolla. Schoemehl, an idiot, forgot that the vast majority of the Missouri voting public were from small towns like Rolla and were, quite proudly, Rednecks, but didn't appreciate some big city Liberal flinging it around like the N-word.

Carnahan became our governor for two terms, only later to die tragically in an aviation accident a few weeks before the 2000 senate election. In death, Carnahan went on to beat "Let the Eagle's Soar" singer/songwriter, Republican (and former Missouri governor) John Ashcroft, who, for not bitching too much about the loss, was rewarded with being named Attorney General of the United States.

You may remember him from such hits as "The Patriot Act" and the weakening the First and Fourth Amendments.

But politically, this is the environment of Missouri. KC partisans to the left of me, St. Louis Liberals to the right and here I am, stuck in the backwoods with you ...

Despite this ideological divide, Missourians and Missou-rahans can join together on things like getting a presidential or vice presidential debate. Washington University in St. Louis, our most prestigious private university in the state is playing host. Somehow the university has managed to snag one of these high profile debates every four years since 1992. This vice presidential debate, about to start in less than two hours central time (it's about 6 p.m. now), will finally end one level of ridiculousness before moving us on to the next.

Wednesday, Chris Matthews actually carried on a discussion as to whether or not Joe Biden should pull out Sarah Palin's chair for her -- even though both will be standing during this debate. Right now, commercials are airing attacking either Palin or John McCain's judgment in picking Palin and both in terms I would describe as cruel and crueler.

The first, repeatedly shown on CNN featured footage of aeral wolf hunts, essentially making the accusation that Palin is a cruel wolf killing, animal hater (Defender of Wildlife Action Fund). The second was borderline inappropriate if only because it featured a power ballad with the chorus "One Heartbeat Away," damning headlines about Palin's controversial decisions as mayor and governor with an image of a steadily fading away McCain as a heart monitor flatlines (CA Nurses Association). I'm against McCain, but a flatline? Really? The song's catchy and funny, if it were a skit on Saturday Night Live or The Daily Show, but as a campaign ad?

I'm guessing that ad will probably be pulled come the next few days.

I don't know how Missouri is going to go in the election. The race is close here, but some pundits are putting us in Barack Obama's column even though I still think we're still a toss-up. Missouri tends to pick the winner because we're a bellwether state. We go as the country goes. But as with Schoemehl, I hope everyone, from Biden to the surrogates to Obama himself, stay away from accidentally insulting an entire subgroup of people in an effort to get one over on their opponent. I want people to be hard-hitting, but not ignorantly swinging away. Especially when they're technically in the lead.

I don't expect Biden to call Palin the Redneck from Wasilla. But Palin could also stand to avoid heading down the well worn path of snide and divide if only because as a St. Louisan who gets tired of being lambasted for the audacity of being multicultural, "different" and "not one of us." I get tired of hearing intelligence and exceptionalism bashed, along with any religion that doesn't involve Jesus (and I love Jesus, but it's not necessary to be jerks). I don't need another us against them, I'm a real American because I shop at Wal-Mart and you aren't because you like Target. It's incredibly dumb. But I know why people do this because it is easier to play to the lowest of human nature, to our lizard, primate brains, than to appeal to any sort of logic or critical thinking.

We say we're from the "show me state," but our criticizes will gladly -- like all Americans -- take the lazy route and just say, "tell me." Tell me exactly what I want to hear.

I'll be watching for sport. Not for knowledge, but I do love a good fight. It'll either be dull as dirt or highly insane.

Here's one vote for chaos.

Sarah Palin Gets The New Yorker Treatment

Couldn't happen to a nicer person. (Courtesy of The Huffington Post)

GIBSON: What insight into Russian actions, particularly in the last couple of weeks, does the proximity of the state give you?

PALIN: They're our next door neighbors and you can actually see Russia from land here in Alaska, from an island in Alaska.

Extreme Palin: Her Face On A Corn Maze. Really?

I imagine it's because she's corny as hell, right? Right?

Never has one woman who has impressed so little inspired so much.

Buyer's Remorse

Conservative columnist Kathleen Parker wants her money back. Well, not actual money, but she would probably like to take a few words back. If she ever said anything good about Gov. Sarah Palin, she'd like to take that back, please!

From The National Review, by-the-way of The Huffington Post:

As we’ve seen and heard more from John McCain’s running mate, it is increasingly clear that Palin is a problem. Quick study or not, she doesn’t know enough about economics and foreign policy to make Americans comfortable with a President Palin should conditions warrant her promotion.

Palin’s recent interviews with Charles Gibson, Sean Hannity, and now Katie Couric have all revealed an attractive, earnest, confident candidate. Who Is Clearly Out Of Her League.

No one hates saying that more than I do. Like so many women, I’ve been pulling for Palin, wishing her the best, hoping she will perform brilliantly. I’ve also noticed that I watch her interviews with the held breath of an anxious parent, my finger poised over the mute button in case it gets too painful. Unfortunately, it often does. My cringe reflex is exhausted ...

If BS were currency, Palin could bail out Wall Street herself.

For those counting, The George Will Revolt now includes: David Brooks, Kathleen Parker and Lou Dobbs (although, technically, he hates everyone).

Someone Stop the Bleeding

Lawd, have mercy. I didn't think anything could be worse than the first interview. It's like Katie's Mike Wallace here. I actually winced through the uncomfortably long Russia-Alaska-Canada connection. It was beyond absurd. Especially considering the part of "Russia" they are near is the most sparsely populated part -- Siberia -- home of the arctic tundra, a few prisons and oil pipelines.

She also made a strange reference to Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin that didin't make a lick of sense. Then proceed to praise Henry Kissenger then claim Kissenger was not for talking with Iranian officials or President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad without conditions only for Couric to correct in the bookend to her interview that Palin didn't know what she was talking about. Again.

And now it is officially depressing and part of me feels some pity. Katie? Why did you have to be so cruel? Why did you have to ask questions? Why couldn't you have been more like Sean Hannity and stack your interview with leading, loaded questions about how wrong everyone is and how right she and John McCain are? Why would you just set up the pins so her talking points could come knock them down? No. You had to open your mouth, say things then expect Sarah to say things back. Mean, Katie. Sooo mean.

Katie Couric Beats the Palin Pinata

When CBS News anchor Katie Couric starts getting licks in it's time to be concerned. I'm not saying Couric is a bad journalist or a featherweight. I didn't mind her all when she was on the Today Show. And sure, she's the second-to-weakest link on 60 Minutes. (The weakest would be Anderson Cooper. I still don't know why he's there.) But when Katie starts pulling jack moves at the end of the interview pointing out how you are dodging her question, whipping out the "not to belabor the point" at the end, only to watch you slap yourself silly with the fact that you don't know what you're talking about you're in trouble. No wonder Sarah Palin is being sheilded from the press. Sweet Betsy, someone might ask her a real question and expect her to know things like "facts" and "her running-mate's voting record." The best she can do is be Talking Points Bot 1.0. All she can do is regurgitate what they made her memorize. Shallow is as deep as this kiddie pool goes.

The Sick of Sarah Palin Club: Alaska Chapter

Recently when Gov. Sarah Palin returned to Alaska after being picked as John McCain's running mate she was greeted by 1,400 Alaskans who though McCain picked the wrong woman. While most of America was still falling in love with the self-professed "hockey mom" who is just like us, these individuals, mostly women, felt the need to point out that not everyone was head over heels for the Manchurian vice presidential candidate.

These are from the Alaskan Women Reject Sarah Palin Rally that happened over a week ago.

The woman in the hockey jersey and long, braided ponytails was quite inventive, putting her sign "Hockey Mama For Obama" on a hockey stick. I also enjoyed the new take on the McCain-Palin logo, reckless-inexperienced.

This woman's sign doubles as a weapon. Perhaps she feels the need to be armed with a spiked wooden stake because "Palin is a dangerous northern extremist!" ... and a vampire.

This one reminds me of the flag of the US continental army with the rattlesnake and "Don't tread on me" written on it. Only it's a black crow telling me to "beware of tricksters." Kind of creepy, but I like it.

Palin has a pretty devoted following in Alaska so it's not surprising that a few non-Palin fans feel some folks have spent a little too much time drinking the Palin-aid and trying to convince others it's refreshing and delicious. Carly Fiorina tried the Kool-Aid and wouldn't you know it? It came right back up.

Palin, quite famously, fought the government when they were trying to put the polar bear back on the endangered species list. I don't know if Palin knows this, but we're largely a nation of animal lovers to the point of lunacy, especially if those animals make cute plush toys. I'd love to here her try to explain why she wants to kill Knut's relatives. Seriously. Answer that in a way that doesn't sound heartless to the bear-of-any-kind-lovers in the lower 48. And you don't want to mess with PETA. Those mo-fos are crazy.

They sent Michael Vick to prison over dog fighting. Granted, he was a despised black man, but former Sen. Bill Frist killed some cats and Judith Nathan Giuliani killed some dogs, both in the name of some "questionable" science and serious ass covering. While it didn't "dog" them politically, it would have if either (or their spouse) had ever gotten out of starting gate.

Anyway, Frist's presidential dreams died with Terri Schiavo.

Agreed. Sarah Palin is a lot like Bush in a skirt. Oo! Ooo! What's the difference between Gov. Sarah Palin and President George W. Bush? LIPSTICK!

It's understandable that this kid would point out that Sarah Palin does not speak for him. She doesn't speak for a lot of women and children based on her policies. I don't know where to begin almost. I think the most outrageous was how as mayor of Wasilla the city charged rape victims for their testing kits. As if it weren't hard enough for sexual assault victims to seek help and get justice, now the indignity of being charged for an unspeakable act being perpetrated against them. Palin has backed off from this, even though the state legislature had to create a law to stop the charging. And, shock-shock, Wasilla was the only town doing this.

She should be glad she's on the bottom of the ticket because if she were up top she'd be hanging out with Rudy "One Delegate" Giuliani.

You'd think that "God's will is not a foreign policy," but I'm almost positive "because Jesus told me so" is the Republican Party platform. I still don't know why the Prince of Peace would want to hang out with some contradictory war hawks (I'm almost positive Jesus is a dove), but whatever. Who want's to listen to a Jewish carpenter with a "God Complex?"

The Sick of Sarah Palin Club: Sen. Chuck Hagel Gives The Palin Four Thumbs Down

Is it just me, or did Republican Sen. Chuck Hagel jack John McCain's "maverick," busting heads with your own party angle, years ago? Ever since McCain cuddled up to Georgie Porgie in hopes of tricking the party base into liking him, that whole "maverick/Country First" label reads more like "party capitulator/McCain First."

Hagel didn't mince words. He's a member of the club.

Sen. Chuck Hagel of Nebraska yesterday became the nation’s most prominent Republican officeholder to publicly question whether Sarah Palin has the experience to serve as president.

"She doesn’t have any foreign policy credentials," Hagel said in an interview with the Omaha World-Herald. "You get a passport for the first time in your life last year? I mean, I don’t know what you can say. You can’t say anything."

Then Hagel said something I've been thinking ever since this insane -- the most insane of all the Palin talking points -- was first pushed by Republicans.

Palin has cited the proximity of Alaska to Russia as evidence of her international experience.

Hagel scoffed at that notion.

"I think they ought to be just honest about it and stop the nonsense about, 'I look out my window and I see Russia and so therefore I know something about Russia,'" he said. "That kind of thing is insulting to the American people."

Indeed! I feel her whole selection was insulting to the American people. But some Americans, unlike us and Chuck, don't realize they've just been told they're idiots. You just had an email-hiding, rape-kit-charging, book-banning, dictatorial, your-body-her-choice, "I can see Russia from my house" farce foisted up on you and you shouted, "Awesome! She's hot and makes moose burgers! And she is got a knocked up teenage daughter! She's just like me! She's real!"

Of course Bush was elected twice. Of course!

Welcome to the club, Chuck!

In other news, at a women's forum in North Carolina Thursday morning, Michelle Obama quipped that voters should choose based on the issues, not because they like a candidate or think "she's cute."

La Femme Obama then clarified with a smile and laugh that she was referring to herself.

Now, isn't she a sly one?

The Sick of Sarah Palin Club: Relief on the way?

Not since I sat through three hours of "Titanic" waiting for the boat to sink have I wanted so desperately for something to end.

Thanks, sadly, to an unstable financial sector, veep candidate Sarah Palin has been nudged aside just a bit so some real news could get covered. But there are other indicators that Palin person will finally be reduced to her more human-like stature. A little less Annie Oakley of the Artic mythology and some regular, greenhorn politicking, lawyering up against ethics investigations and avoiding all contact with the press.

Because, dear Lord, we don't want to know what could happen if someone asked her a question in a situation where she couldn't quickly defer to her talking points on a teleprompter.

Along with this I have some portents of what I hope signal the official end of the Moose burger era and a return to rationality to some degree.

Conservatives Turn On McCain-Palin: This Huffington Post story doesn't take any sort of official poll on the matter, but points to some conservative word jockeys who are a little annoyed with John McCain for blowing his "Country First" credentials by picking a candidate based solely on her ability to jazz up the base, but not on her ability to do anything other than that.

It features this clip from Richard Cohen of The Washington Post:

His opportunistic and irresponsible choice of Sarah Palin as his political heir -- the person in whose hands he would leave the country -- is a form of personal treason, a betrayal of all he once stood for. Palin, no matter what her other attributes, is shockingly unprepared to become president. McCain knows that. He means to win, which is all right; he means to win at all costs, which is not.

Palin's Favorability Numbers Eroding: FiveThirtyEight.com crunches the numbers and thinks Palin's pluses are going flat. They cite her appearance on ABC in an interview with Charles Gibson and Tina Fey's adept mimicry on Saturday Night Live as possible factors in the dip.

The Research 2000 poll for Daily Kos now has Palin's favorability-unfavorability scores at 45-44 -- just a +1. Six days ago, when the poll, launched, she was at a 52-35, a +17 ...

(T)here is a similar decline in her numbers in the Diageo/Hotline poll. Her favorability numbers in yesterday's Hotline poll -- today's isn't out yet -- were a 48-36, or a +12. But a week ago, on September 8, she had been at a 48-24, a +24.

I just want it to be done. Is it done already??? Or does it end after her interview with Sean Hannity? If Sean gives her some "grrl" power will she finally recede to the background?

Lather, Rinse, Repeat

The bar was set so low Gov. Sarah Palin didn't have to do much to pass, but she's going to need a more than cram session with party operatives to ace the final. (Photo: Alaskan Gov. Sarah Palin and ABC News' Charlie Rose, Reuters)

Every answer was answered quickly and assertively as if every word was parsed, perfected and practiced over and over and over again.

I could hear Gov. Sarah Palin's Republican coaches echoing in her ear:

"We are friends with Israel and I don't think that we should second-guess the measures that Israel has to take to defend themselves and for their security."

Who cares that in the real world Israel would never do anything that big without letting us know first, without us being complicit in either the knowledge of the act in presage or in helping execute a strike. We interfere directly with Israel's interests all the time, from pushing for elections in the territories leading to the election of Hamas, to arming Hamas' opposition Fatah even though both organizations hate Israel. (One just didn't want to recognize them as a state.)

There wasn't a lot of depth in her answers. The Alaska is close to Russia foreign policy defense, repeated by so many Republican operatives with straight faces, is starting to border on comical. How is that even a serious answer? To quote Barack Obama:

"They must think you're stupid!"

And throughout the interview I wondered if she thought I was stupid. If she thought I couldn't hear the coaching and see the gears turning in her head. That I could tell the places where she fumbled because she couldn't go deeper than paper thin. That she retreated to her garrisons of "energy" and "talking points" whenever things got too complicated. That she was quick to answer but easy to trap and ABC News' Charlie Gibson tried when asking her about the "Bush Doctrine" (a foreign policy view which morphed over time) or having her clarify if she saw the war on terrorism in the Middle East was a "holy" war, a mission from God, as she alluded to in a testimony she gave at her home church.

It will be interesting how she will handle future interviews. Despite what the operatives squawk, Palin was not vetted and because the press and public knew so little about her there was going to be a gauntlet she would have to run. Avoiding gaffes and traps and verbal slip ups and casualties of personal failings. One false move and all her hard work could be derailed.

She can't do worse than her superior, John McCain, who often falters under questioning, even more so than the president. George W. Bush is not exactly known as an adept speaker, but he's usual good at avoiding traps by either being flip or refusing to answer the question.

McCain can only ramble, making mistakes and misspeaking but usually escaping unscathed due to his decades in the public view. Palin doesn't have that to fall on. She can't just blurt "war hero" as a cry of "uncle" causing the other side to relent. The Republican Party has suddenly become righteous about sexism charging headfirst into "The Boy Who Cried Wolf" territory with Palin. They cry sexism over every criticism even though they and Palin once described women who point out prejudice and privilege are "whining."

Maybe the chorus of hockey moms crying "she's just like us" because she the Brett Favre of vice presidential candidates, can protect her. That they can shelter her with the belief she's just a "regular dude (or dudette in this case)." She married young, she's a working mom and her teenage daughter is pregnant.

She's just like us.

I find this mantra both silly and scary because why would you want someone like you to be president? You want your president to be better than you. Your vice president to be better than you. To be "elites." The creme of the brulee. For them both to be smarter and more savvy and more cunning than you because they're going to be leader of the free world.

Not the head of your bowling league team.

Being a regular dudette is not a threshold you have to cross to be a candidate for the number two spot on a presidential ticket. I want to know if you've got game. If you can bring it. If you are rock solid. If you can take it -- the criticism, the heat, the pressure, the pain, the politics, because it never lets up. Because if you win you enter a whole new world of internal and external pressures that never takes a holiday, even when you do.

I know I couldn't take it. Could you? Can Sarah Palin?

She hasn't proved that to me. Not yet. But the test has only begun and next time it won't be open book.

Drama-Rama in the McCain Campaign

The criticism keeps coming about John McCain picking Alaskan Gov. Sarah Palin for vice president. And no matter how the talking heads spin it, most presidential candidates -- Democrat or Republican -- would not have tapped a woman under investigation for some duplicitous firing situation, who was dealing with the sensitive family drama of teen pregnancy and was so far to the right of Attila the Hun that her views and her novice nature on the national (and international) scene scare the pants of independents and Democrats.

I already thought Palin was a hasty decision, made in the wee hours after the closing of the Democratic National Convention. She was an reactionary pick, a gut check, not thought through. And this looks more and more like the truth with the Republican Party dispatching operatives to Alaska as fast as the press and the tabloids are.

Aides to Mr. McCain said they had a team on the ground in Alaska now to look more thoroughly into Ms. Palin’s background. A Republican with ties to the campaign said the team assigned to vet Ms. Palin in Alaska had not arrived there until Thursday, a day before Mr. McCain stunned the political world with his vice-presidential choice. The campaign was still calling Republican operatives as late as Sunday night asking them to go to Alaska to deal with the unexpected candidacy of Ms. Palin. (NYT)

People will toss the tundra in search for all the dirt they can find on Mrs. Clean and we're heading into bizarre territory with so many odd skeletons falling out of Palin's political and personal closet.

She has a private lawyer in an ethics investigation trying to determine whether "she abused her power in dismissing the state’s public safety commissioner;" and her husband was convicted 22-years-ago on a DUI charge. (NYT)

The scandal "Troopergate" involves Palin, members of her staff and her husband pressuring the state's public safety commissioner to fire her brother-in-law who was in the middle of a contentious divorce with her sister. (Anchorage Daily News via Jack and Jill Politics)

Palin has her own controversial pastor troubles -- an ongoing them in the 2008 race with Rev. Wright, then Rev. Hagee and now with Wasilla Assembly of God Pastor Ed Kalnins who has "preached that critics of President Bush will be banished to hell; questioned whether people who voted for Sen. John Kerry in 2004 would be accepted to heaven; charged that the 9/11 terrorist attacks and war in Iraq were part of a war 'contending for your faith;' and said that Jesus 'operated from that position of war mode.'" (Huffington Post)

She depending on who you ask, she backed controversial candidate Pat Buchanan's presidential run. She said she didn't. Pat Buchanan said she did. (Washington Post)

Palin has a much more complicated relationship with embattled, indicted Republican Sen. Ted Stevens and flip-flopped on "The Bridge to Nowhere" deal. (Washington Post)

Palin was fine with earmarks when she was Mayor of Wasilla, securing a lot of government cash for her city. (Washington Post)

She is against abortion, even in the cases of rape or incest. (Jack and Jill Politics)

She was almost recalled as mayor of Wasilla after she tried to have the police chief and library director fired for not supporting her reelection campaign in 1996. (Huffington Post) (Jack and Jill Politics)

Then there's the matter of her pregnant teen daughter, thrust into the spotlight. She and her mother are being lauded by the right while ignoring the hypocrisy of holding two diametrically opposing views at once.

Despite the whole "teen premarital sex" issue that the vast majority of Christian conservatives claim they are against, including pushing abstinence only education, everyone seems "OK," arguing teen pregnancy is "normal." I can't help but think their opinion would be different if it were anyone else (see the Obama daughters if they were older). It was Christian conservatives who worried Jamie Lyn Spears pregnancy glamorized teen pregnancy. And the abstinence only program teaches that all birth control methods are unreliable so you shouldn't have sex at all until you are married. Of course, teens being teens, they have sex anyway. Only now, unsafe, unprotected sex. But for some reason everything is grand with the same crowd who usually bemoans behavior.

Yet another mixed message. Premarital sex is OK, as long as you marry the person you're doing it with ... eventually. Glad to know the goal posts got moved back a bit more.

The more and more that trickles out the more and more I'm positive she was never vetted no matter what the McCain campaign says. She would be leper in the eyes of most president wannabes, the equivalent of Barack Obama selecting Kwame Kilpatrick as his no. 2. No one would want this kind of negative press, not to mention all the gross shock jock talk about Palin's comeliness and McCain's penchant for pretty ladies. If Hillary's sin was being dumpy and always wearing pantsuits, Palin's cross to bare will be her youth and beauty ... further compounded by the investigations and baby dramas.

I don't care how much the base loves her. The based would have loved a lot of pro-lifers who were being vetted. But McCain couldn't have Liebermann or Tom Ridge so he chose the craziest veep pick ever.

What else is going to happen? Is the woman going to appear in a grainy picture of the grassy knoll? Did she really kill Nicole Simpson and Ron Goldman?

If Palin was a roll of the dice, I'm starting to think McCain shot craps.

Palin: Daughter Pregnant! (Again?)

From Politico.com:

Besieged by blog rumors about her 17-year-old daughter, Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin — named Friday as running mate of Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) — released a statement Monday saying her daughter is pregnant and plans to marry the father.

The governor and her husband, Todd, said their daughter, Bristol, plans to keep the baby.

"Our beautiful daughter Bristol came to us with news that as parents we knew would make her grow up faster than we had ever planned," the Palins said in the statement. "As Bristol faces the responsibilities of adulthood, she knows she has our unconditional love and support."

Liberal bloggers have speculated extensively about the possibility that Palin's fifth child, born this spring, was actually her daughter's.

Hmmmm ... this doesn't sound good and doesn't exactly kill that rumor. At. All. Now people will be even more determined.

This is very much starting to turn into an Tom Eagleton situation, but let's see what happens. There's a hurricane going on in the gulf coast so this isn't going to get the kind of attention it normally would in the 24-hour news cycle.

A politician's kids should not be part of the debate, but with Gov. Sarah Palin using the culture wars and her own family values as her conservative credentials, the private and personal becomes the public and judgmental pretty fast. And left is BRUTAL on family values candidates who have a house out of order, often calling them hypocrites.

I feel sorry for 17-year-old Bristol Palin. Her mom really should have thought about what this campaign, what the press would do to her when there is this juicy of a rumor floating about the internet that her mother's youngest is really her baby. And saying she's pregnant now doesn't really kill the rumor, but make people even more curious. It's just messed up because as much as I don't want McCain/Palin to win, the daughter's exploits should be separate from her mother's campaign ... even if the mother is using her family as evidence of her piousness and judgment.

If anything, this makes John McCain look very reckless in his VP pick. (The New York Post claims McCain knew about the pregnancy before he picked her.) Most politicians wouldn't have risked this due to the unknown fall-out. I still think Palin was not vetted and McCain went with his gut.

His dangerous, Crazy gut. And that's why the prospect of him in the White House frightens me. If he can be this out-of-control when picking a veep I'm scared to see how he's going to deal with Vlad the Putin.

McCain Campaign Looks Into the Eyes of Obama and Blinks, Dipping Into "The Crazy" With Veep Pick

My first reaction was "Who?" Quickly followed by a "what the f...?" To steal the talking heads from gushing about Obama's speech John McCain attempted to throw a curve ball with Gov. Sarah Palin from Alaska.

If his goal was to confuse the shit out of everyone -- mission accomplished!

I get the feeling the McCain campaign made this decision in the wee hours after Obama's speech. After all, the news was supposed to leak at midnight, but it didn't, signaling that the closing of the Democratic National Convention was THAT GOOD. Apparently the spectacle and revelry was not "too much" and "arrogant." Apparently it set just nicely with folks as the awe inspiring rah-rah, "Go, Speed Racer Go!" vibe the Dems wanted.

The Palin pick smells like fear. Fear that the unity of the Clintonistas and the Obama-ites after all that feel good Stevie Wonder backed lovin' could bolster the Obama-Biden ticket to the top. Palin is a Trojan horse meant to sway disgruntled feminist Democrats and lure them to the Republican ticket. And people joked that Biden was an "Affirmative Action" pick -- Palin is like an Evangelical Geraldine Ferraro with an NRA membership, a first time governor who's only in her second year and under investigation according to CNN.

I realize that some Republican players are attempting to spin this WTF into a good thing (She has two whole years of executive experience! She's a social and fiscal conservative! Joe Biden can't slap down a woman in a debate without looking like an asshole!), but she's the governor of Alaska. How many votes in the electoral college does that pull? The Obama campaign is actually "pleased" with the pick as they feel the experience argument is now off the table now that McCain has picked a relatively unknown, not vetted 44-year-old.

On CNN the talking heads are arguing that this pick shows that McCain wants to be seen as the "real" agent of change by this wild card pick. Reporters Suzanne Malveaux and Gloria Borger are reporting that some Republicans are scratching their heads. I think John McCain started dippin' into The Crazy, whippin' out the Maverick card.

Ultimately, people don't pick their president because of their veep selection, but just as it was odd that George "Poppy" Bush picked the dimwitted Dan Quayle to be within a heartbeat of the presidency, McCain, who turned 72 today, has strangely picked an unknown out of fear of the successful public relations coup that was the Democratic National Convention.

Smart move to distract the press and get them to stop cooing about Obama's speech, poor move for the future. If he wanted to pick a woman he should have picked the former head of Hewlett-Packard, Carly Fiorina, Texas Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchinson or Sen. Elizabeth Dole or ANYONE that people have actually heard of. (Fiorina was so effective as a surrogate she was able to tote views I didn't agree with yet I still enjoyed listening to her.)

Is this woman the future of the Republican Party? Is this someone they're going to rally around for president if McCain wins and decides to be a one-termer? Is she prepared to be the leader of the free world if McCain pulls a William Henry Harrison? And is this to generate some excitement? According to CNN, the McCain campaign had to bus people in from out of town because they couldn't wrangle 10,000 in Dayton for this announcement. He had Tim Pawlenty and Mitt Romney there with him, but obviously flenched when Obama painted him as old, staid and out-of-touch.

But out of all this ridiculousness, I'm mostly disappointed that he did not pick my boy "Perfect Hair" Mitt Romney, aka "Guy Smiley" from The Muppet Show. I'm just distraught. No one worked insincerity like Mitt Romney. Every word he uttered sounded like the crowing of a used car salesman.

What will I do? Who will I make fun of? Damn you, Sarah Palin! Damn you!

United We Stand: A Pictorial

Joe Biden! Come on down!

For better or worse, Sen. Joe Biden is "The One." The best out of the best. The closest thing to Hillary Clinton's talent for pugilism without the whole "we hate each other" pathos. And yeah, he's said some borderline ignorant things about black people and Asians. So he'll need a little refresher course in political correctness 101. Newsweek argues that Biden was just the change Barack Obama needed.

In public, Obama's aides argue there are two main factors that make Biden attractive: his foreign policy experience, and his image as a humble family man from Wilmington, Del. While Biden has decades of experience on Capitol Hill, he commutes to Wilmington each day, and has maintained what sounds like an unscripted voice.

But in private, they point to a much more immediate and strategic reason for his elevation to veep nominee: his killer instincts as a campaigner and his cultural reach.

Obama's aides admire Biden's skills as a debater and chief surrogate who can fillet the Republican ticket in speeches and media interviews. For all his problems as a verbose questioner in the Senate, he proved he could turn a one-liner and land a zinger better than almost anyone campaigning for president this year. Biden's abilities to play the role of attack dog was a winning argument for his selection, allowing Obama himself to remain above the fray.

"He'll have a fist in the face of John McCain every day and I think he has this level of gravitas as well," said one senior adviser to Obama. "We're lucky to have both. It showcases Obama's judgment that he chose somebody like this—a good pick not just for August or October, but a good pick in the event that something happens when he's president of the United States."

I usually try to keep my emotions out of this whole deal, with the knowledge that this is political theater that is meant to invoke reverberations of hope and optimism. I want to stay focused on the issues and not the drama, but I have to admit, I got a little verklempt during Biden's anointing to veep candidate.

There was something about seeing this come full circle from Obama's announcement in Springfield, Ill. to him becoming the presumptive nominee to now selecting his running mate and giving that old dog Biden a chance to bask in Barack's 100 watt glow. In my heart I want Barack to win, but when I game the system in my head I always see him lose. It's a frustrating thing, being for a candidate but worrying that despite his talent and skills he could still lose due to a myriad of factors based on the electoral college map.

As I watched and listened I said to Papa Snob, "God, I hope I'm wrong and he wins."

And Papa said, "If he doesn't it won't be because he didn't have the opportunity."

And that's what was magic about it. He seized the moment and went for broke. He is popular. He is liked. He is the nominee. He's in the lead. He is becoming the de facto head of the party. He is ascending and it is brilliant to watch. Papa and I are amazed. You always hope for it, but never in our lives did we think we'd see it.

During the Missouri Primary Papa admitted that he voted for Hillary out of logic, but his heart was always rooting for Obama. He's so proud, yet like me, so worried about this election. It's still early, but the polls are too close for someone so young, fresh and new to be barely edging out mister old, grumpy and devoid of ideas. Perhaps the polling is off. After all, it's not reaching the millions of people who use their cell phones as their primary line.

Therefore when I saw the "Obama Biden" signs and I saw them on stage together I felt a little twinge of hope. The hard, cold ice of my cynical political heart melting a bit for a long sought after dream.

This is not my favorite dress of Michelle's, but I have to admit, future FLOTUS was looking hot. Hair on point. Make-up and skin, flawless. Femme, yet fierce. Casual, yet perfect for the great significance of this day. And look at the smile on Barack's face. I can almost hear him saying, "Wheeeee, I'm the nomineeeee!"

Barack leaves Chicago airport, greets Illinois State Troopers.

Sen. Joe Biden kisses his family good-bye. After years of trying to get to the White House he finally has a golden ticket on Obama Force One. He's ready to go to work.

They once fought for the top of the ticket. Now they've joined forces to fight John McCain and The Machine. Biden may have a big mouth, but I'd rather have that dog sicked on anyone but the "O" man.

It's a love fest! Everyone feel the duel power of two powerful senators embarking uncharted political waters while their flawless, femme yet fierce wives cheer them on. But it gets more adorable! Looks like Michelle has a new BFF!

Did I mention that Michelle looks ravishing in these pictures? Makes me forget how much I hate that dress' pattern. She and Jill Biden look wondrous. United they stand, quite fabulously, for Obama-Biden in '08.

All photos are by Reuters, AFP and The Associated Press.